 We have been sold a lie that it's our action that makes things happen, that it's our words that cause changes in people & situations around us, that it's our will power that is our true power. None of this is true. Our true power lies in our energy, in our consciousness, in our alignment. The universe & people respond to your energy more than any words that you speak. You only need to look around you at those you react to to see that this is true. It's not about what they say, it's about who you feel they are. This means that confrontation is not the best way of dealing with problems. Because the problem is within us & our energy. However, when the problem is in us & it causes painful situations, we still need to feel & release those emotions involved, through expressing them, but not using this to try to change another. An example: Mary is insecure. She's in a relationship, which is a good relationship, but she feels jealousy when he sees her partner show any attention to another woman. This jealousy feels terrible to her, it's not something that can be ignored because it hurts her. But confrontation is not the way to approach this, because the problem is not with her partner. Yet she needs to express her feelings truthfully to release them before she can look deeper at the cause of this within her. The best way to do this is to write a letter that never gets sent. Her feelings are real, they are a reaction to her thoughts & the situation, and in writing a letter to her partner about her feelings, she can feel them & release it. It's like having the confrontation that your emotions are telling you to have, in order to release them, without having the confrontation itself. This sets Mary free to then look within at why she has a pattern of feeling insecure so that she can choose to feel secure. The whole world responds to your energy, your alignment, more than your words or actions. Your energy is already heard by the whole universe, you don't need to plead your case to be heard.  I'm Claire Louise Hay, I help you claim your true power to manifest the life of your dreams through self-awareness and alignment with your higher self.
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 You've heard about the law of attraction right? It has the power to totally transform your life from mundane to magical once you understand that your thoughts & energy creates. But there is also a lot of mis-information out there, or information that can be taken the wrong way. I used to be confused about my negative feelings, about what to do with them, about HOW to use them as feedback. Do I ignore the feelings so that I don't attract more of what is making me feel bad? Do I let bad feelings pass me by? Do I ignore what is causing these bad feelings & pretend I don't see them? If I act on these feelings to remove it from my life, am I just inviting more of what makes me feel bad in? If I'm experiencing contrast am I doing something wrong? Am I wrong? There are thoughts within us that give us negative feelings & there are things, people, places, etc. outside of us that give us negative feelings. When it is our own thoughts or projections that are giving us these negative feelings then that is a sure sign that our higher selves don't agree with us & a change in our thoughts to aligned thoughts will make us feel better. But when it is something outside of ourselves that is making us feel bad, is that bad feeling an emotional reaction that will attract more of what we don't want, or is it important feedback to take action to get rid of it from our lives? Let's look at this example: Mary doesn't like it when people are rude to her or even if she sees someone being rude to someone else. It drives her crazy. On Monday she was busy at work when someone came into the shop & after just a short wait they started complaining to her that she hadn't helped them yet. She was really busy & had even speeded up what she was doing so that she could help them sooner, but now she felt like stopping what she was doing & making them wait even longer. She pushed her feelings down & told them she wouldn't be much longer & she helped them as soon as she could. In her break later she complained with her colleagues about rude entitled people & how they are the worst part of the job. Will Mary keep attracting rude impatient people in this example? Yes she will. She didn't feel the negative emotion that she was feeling & use it to act upon it, to either make a new decision as to whether she really wants to work there, or to tell the customer that she isn't able to give instant service because she has other things to do first but maybe there is somewhere else that can give instant service, or to tell them that she cannot help them & to know for sure that she doesn't need inpatient rude customers because she prefers patient, appreciative customers instead. Instead she prioritised the customers negative feelings instead of her own negative feelings & she took the blow of it. Subtle changes in the way we deal with things makes all the difference. But let's make it simple & talk about rotting fruit instead. If there is some rotting fruit in your fruit bowl, should you: a. Ignore it or you might attract more rotten fruit into your life then wonder what you did wrong when all of your fruit becomes rotten, maybe you didn't ignore it perfectly enough? b. Look at the rotten fruit, pretend that it isn't rotten, affirm that it is fresh & meditate? c. Throw the rotten fruit out before it makes the other fruit rotten because you prefer fresh fruit & you want to enjoy the fruit that is good? Now it's simple. The answer is c. But but but... that's an action step & law of attraction says that I created it! No. Rotting fruit exists. Think of it as contrast. It's ok for rotting fruit to exist. All fruit rots when it is left long enough. You might even let it inspire you to eat your fruit more quickly, or to buy less of it in future. The truth is that if you don't feel your negative emotions & act on them in the moment, you'll end up with all of your fruit rotting because when you leave a piece of rotting fruit it will infect the rest of the fruit bowl. But then don't go around telling all of your friends the story about your rotting fruit, asking them if their fruit also rots, joining a protest group about rotting fruit & dedicating your life to the elimination of rotten fruit, because that WILL attract more! Have you been ignoring the rotting fruit in your life? How has that been affecting the rest of your life? Tell us in the comments below  I'm Claire Louise Hay, I help you claim your true power to manifest the life of your dreams through self-awareness and alignment with your higher self.
Want to work with me? Click here to find out how!  I'm not into fluffy-nonsense spirituality. If it isn't practical & it can't help me to get into alignment then it can flow right out of my experience. Don't get me wrong, there is a place for soothing, there is a time for comfort & hugs when you are damaged & raw. But once we are over those wobbly times we need empowered practical advice! The path of love: Fluffy nonsense or practical life advice? I googled path of love just before I wrote this, I found some fluffy nonsense & I also found some things that are just plain wrong: it's not for the faint of heart, it's a test, it's charity, forget the I, it's never a smooth ride,... Let me tell you what the path of love actually is, according to my very practical higher self! You are a unique being, you have your own personal blend of likes, dislikes, & things you love. As you focus on the things that you love, doing them, writing about them, singing about them, you feel more love. As you feel more love you attract thoughts, things, people, opportunities that match that. This means that you attract thoughts about more things that you already love or will love if only you knew about them. You attract things that you love. You attract people who you love & those who you will love once you meet them. You attract opportunities to feel more love. You become a total love magnet, attracting the things that YOU love. It's very much a personal path of selfishness. You can't get that same feeling by focusing on things that other people love but you don't. You can't get it by focusing on what you don't like in the world. You can't get it from focusing on what you don't like. You can't get it by focusing on what you think is wrong with the world, with people, with you,... Once you are on this path of love, you get super focused on certain things that you really love, you start to share it with the world, people who would also love what you love can't help but be attracted to your love vibe, they want to love what you love too, they want what you have. You attract your tribe of people who love what you love & you all love it together feeling more & more joy. It's infectious. Then you see something that you don't love. You don't feel good. Now you're on the path of hate, you don't like it, you attract more things that you don't like, you start to see things wrong with people, the world, you feel worse & worse, you attract people who don't love either, who are hating too, you get together to right the wrongs of the world & you fool yourself into thinking you are on the path of love, it's not for the faint of heart, it's a test, it's charity, forget the I, it's never a smooth ride,... Then you wake up, you focus on what you love again, you get back on the true path of love. The only way onto this path of love is from within. You MUST focus on what YOU love & remain true to that. When you get on this upward spiral it gets easier & easier to stay on the path of love. You will be amazed at where the path of love will take you in life, to the best places, the best people, the best opportunities, the best feelings, the best relationships, the best business, the most joy, the most fun, to everything you have ever wanted! Where can you start today? What do you love? Tell us in the comments.  I'm Claire Louise Hay, I help you claim your true power to manifest the life of your dreams through self-awareness and alignment with your higher self.
Want to work with me? Click here to find out how!  Compassionate souls have a desire to love & care for everybody, especially those who aren't looking after themselves. But these same compassionate souls have hard lesson after hard lesson while they do this, until they learn the difference between enabling & the loving care that actually benefits the recipient. In the 1980's food aid was sent into Africa to help feed those who were struggling to feed themselves. It had an unintended negative consequence. Free food was dropped into communities. These communities were used to growing their own food, but once they had a supply of free food they stopped planting their crops, they stopped tending to the land, they didn't need to anymore, food was being brought to them. So when the free food ran out, they were left in a worse position than before. They had to start again with even less resources than they had before. There are numerous examples that show us that doing things for other people, rather than empowering them to do it for themselves, has disasterous consequences. It's easy to see these things on the bigger scale, for the obvious examples, but what about when we look at the smaller scale, who we are loving & caring for around us? Is it loving & caring to give a man free fish or to teach him to fish for himself? Is it loving & caring to always tie your child's shoelaces or to teach them to do it for themselves? Is it loving & caring to get an addict their drug of choice or to help them to recover from it? Is it loving & caring to clean up someone's mess (house, life, relationships,...) or let them suffer their own consequences? The loving & caring thing is often unclear. We try to help sometimes, but what we are actually doing is enabling others not to learn to care for themselves, we are being codependent. I've been doing what I do professionally for 19 years now & it took me quite a few years more than I'd care to admit to, to realise that I can't help people who don't help themselves. That is: if someone isn't seeking the help & isn't willing to invest in themselves to get that help, then if I try to help it never helps them. Loving & caring for those who don't do love & care for themselves always backfires. The love & care can't be received, they are like endless drains never able to be filled because we cannot be any one else's source. Their source is within themselves, their own connection with the true source. Take a look around you. Who are you loving & caring for? Who drains you? Who uplifts you? Who are you constantly trying to fix because they seem such a mess? The loving & caring thing to do is to allow them to find their own power within them, for them to actually feel the consequences of their not looking after themselves so that they have the motivation to do it for themselves. This often means people have to hit rock bottom before they will bounce back, but we have all been there & bounce back we do! Are there parts of your life where you are not loving & caring for yourself? Because just as we can enable others who aren't caring for themselves, we can also be the ones who aren't loving & caring for ourselves & wanting others to do that for us. It could be your health, or your relationships, or your finances, or addictions,... When you start to love & care for yourself, you open the door to other people who are loving & caring for themselves, who can also love & care for you too, to come in. When loving & caring people love & care for each other it's a win win situation. It uplifts everyone & disempowers no-one. Which brings me to how you can love & care for others & have a positive effect. Loving & caring for those who are loving & caring for themselves. They are taking responsibility. You are taking responsibility. Neither you nor them NEED care from others, but they want it. This care can be received because they are already receiving the care from themselves. The love is uplifting for everyone because it's reciprocated. It's magical. It never depletes. It is the only true giving. It can only be given by those loving & caring for themselves first.  I'm Claire Louise Hay, I help you claim your true power to manifest the life of your dreams through self-awareness and alignment with your higher self. Want to work with me? Click here to find out how!  It was a celebration, smoke filled the room, everyone was drunk, apart from me, I was a small child. My uncle was blowing smoke rings & I was catching them by poking my finger through them "I'll blow smoke rings when I'm a grown up, this is fun!" The adults had stopped making fun of my shyness, they'd stopped laughing at my body, they'd stopped trying to get me to admit that I fancied my cousin, I didn't even know what that meant anyway. The ordeal upstairs had also stopped. I had been molested by the boys, each taking turns to get into bed with me to touch me. My brother being both the ringleader & the first. This was not a safe situation. I was not cared for. This was an abusive situation, the only reality that I knew. Once I was old enough to take care of myself I removed myself from this abuse, or so I had thought. The truth was I was taking care of myself to the almost the same low levels. At age 47 I was still around alcoholics, I was still being made fun of, I was still being yelled at & put down by people who were pretending to love me, I was still around people who made me feel unsafe, I was still in that smoky atmosphere pretending that I was having fun. It was a shock to wake up to the fact that I was neglecting myself, that I wasn't caring for myself, that I wasn't protecting myself, that I wasn't choosing good situations for myself, still. So I took action, I removed myself from the toxicity. I started to take good care of myself, to be the parent for myself that I wish I had had. The ways in which I find easy to take care of myself, my diet, exercise, they were all ways in which I was taken care of as a child. That has come "naturally" to me as a result of my childhood programming. It's the destructive programming that has to go. Deciding on new boundaries & taking action on them, stepping away from what is not good for me is where I am at. The void. I know that the next step will come naturally when I am ready, when I am re-programmed, the stepping toward what IS good for me. Everyday I'm meditating, I'm exercising, I'm eating healthily, I'm working, I'm reading, I'm going to bed early. I'm focused on the basics, the foundations of good self-care, focused on what I can do positively for myself. I'll let you know when the next step comes along. Are you still caring for yourself in the same way, negative & positive, that you were cared for as a child? Do you need to start to take care of yourself better?  I'm Claire Louise Hay, I help you claim your true power to manifest the life of your dreams through self-awareness and alignment with your higher self. Want to work with me? Click here to find out how! |
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