 We have been sold a lie that it's our action that makes things happen, that it's our words that cause changes in people & situations around us, that it's our will power that is our true power. None of this is true. Our true power lies in our energy, in our consciousness, in our alignment. The universe & people respond to your energy more than any words that you speak. You only need to look around you at those you react to to see that this is true. It's not about what they say, it's about who you feel they are. This means that confrontation is not the best way of dealing with problems. Because the problem is within us & our energy. However, when the problem is in us & it causes painful situations, we still need to feel & release those emotions involved, through expressing them, but not using this to try to change another. An example: Mary is insecure. She's in a relationship, which is a good relationship, but she feels jealousy when he sees her partner show any attention to another woman. This jealousy feels terrible to her, it's not something that can be ignored because it hurts her. But confrontation is not the way to approach this, because the problem is not with her partner. Yet she needs to express her feelings truthfully to release them before she can look deeper at the cause of this within her. The best way to do this is to write a letter that never gets sent. Her feelings are real, they are a reaction to her thoughts & the situation, and in writing a letter to her partner about her feelings, she can feel them & release it. It's like having the confrontation that your emotions are telling you to have, in order to release them, without having the confrontation itself. This sets Mary free to then look within at why she has a pattern of feeling insecure so that she can choose to feel secure. The whole world responds to your energy, your alignment, more than your words or actions. Your energy is already heard by the whole universe, you don't need to plead your case to be heard.  I'm Claire Louise Hay, I help you claim your true power to manifest the life of your dreams through self-awareness and alignment with your higher self.
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 I owed myself the biggest apology for accepting what I didn't deserve. I was going through life accepting whatever life threw at me, presuming that everything was a positive match for me if it was right in front of me, having no discernment, making no good choices for myself. I was just putting up with what life gave me & I was often disappointed. I wondered why the universe thought I was a match to people who didn't respect me, who didn't treat me well. (watch this week's guidance video about letting go of the old stories about disrespect) When I had finally had enough of it & retreated back to myself, away from people, to get clear on what I wanted, it all became clear to me. In that alone time, which took months, when I took care of myself to the highest standard I have ever taken care of myself, I got clear on what I wanted & what I deserved in my life. You see I am great, I'm really great. I started to imagine what it would be like to be in a relationship with ME, with someone just like ME, to receive the love & care that I give in relationships. I started to imagine what it would be like to receive all of the love that I give out into the world back, to the same level, in my business, in my social life, in my relationships, from the whole universe. It felt so good that I was clear that this was what I wanted. If I exist, then other people that are like me exist. The universe doesn't ever make one thing alone & leave it to wither & die because it doesn't have more of its kind to reproduce with, to create with. This is nature! I waited, I was clear & I started making good decisions for myself, I started not only to say no to what I didn't want but to clearly show that I would not tolerate that disrespect. I was stronger in myself, in being myself, without caring about what anyone else wanted from me, because I knew what I wanted. Little by little I started attracting more of my kind & life has never felt so good as it does right now. Let go of your old stories of disrespect & tell your story of what you truly want then wait firm for it. What do you really deserve in your life? Tell us in the comments  I'm Claire Louise Hay, I help you claim your true power to manifest the life of your dreams through self-awareness and alignment with your higher self.
Want to work with me? Click here to find out how!  To claim your power might seem like something you have to do, something that you have to fight for or some behaviour that you have to add into your life. However, empowerment is more about what you let go of. In this week's guidance we were told to let go of what doesn't empower you. How do we even do that? The answer is in self-awareness, which is another way of saying listening to your inner guidance. So what in your life makes you feel small? What diminishes your energy? What makes you step back? What makes you shy away? What makes you go quiet? What makes you tense? All of these feelings are guidance that these are things that don't empower you & you can choose not to have them in your life. That doesn't mean fight them to change them, it means just let them go. Socrates said "The secret to change is to focus all of your energy not on fighting the old, but on building the new." What are the things in your life that make you feel great? That make you feel big, confident, happy, relaxed, powerful,..? This is your guidance too. Focus on those things, say yes to them in your life. So claiming your power isn't about trying to change what is in your life to make you feel better, it's not about taking those things that make you feel bad & pretending they make you feel good, it's not about fighting for the world to be a place that will make you feel better. It's just about choosing what does make you feel better. It's about choosing what allows your energy to grow. What can you let go of today that diminishes your energy? Tell us in the comments!  I'm Claire Louise Hay, I help you claim your true power to manifest the life of your dreams through self-awareness and alignment with your higher self.
Want to work with me? Click here to find out how!  Compassionate souls have a desire to love & care for everybody, especially those who aren't looking after themselves. But these same compassionate souls have hard lesson after hard lesson while they do this, until they learn the difference between enabling & the loving care that actually benefits the recipient. In the 1980's food aid was sent into Africa to help feed those who were struggling to feed themselves. It had an unintended negative consequence. Free food was dropped into communities. These communities were used to growing their own food, but once they had a supply of free food they stopped planting their crops, they stopped tending to the land, they didn't need to anymore, food was being brought to them. So when the free food ran out, they were left in a worse position than before. They had to start again with even less resources than they had before. There are numerous examples that show us that doing things for other people, rather than empowering them to do it for themselves, has disasterous consequences. It's easy to see these things on the bigger scale, for the obvious examples, but what about when we look at the smaller scale, who we are loving & caring for around us? Is it loving & caring to give a man free fish or to teach him to fish for himself? Is it loving & caring to always tie your child's shoelaces or to teach them to do it for themselves? Is it loving & caring to get an addict their drug of choice or to help them to recover from it? Is it loving & caring to clean up someone's mess (house, life, relationships,...) or let them suffer their own consequences? The loving & caring thing is often unclear. We try to help sometimes, but what we are actually doing is enabling others not to learn to care for themselves, we are being codependent. I've been doing what I do professionally for 19 years now & it took me quite a few years more than I'd care to admit to, to realise that I can't help people who don't help themselves. That is: if someone isn't seeking the help & isn't willing to invest in themselves to get that help, then if I try to help it never helps them. Loving & caring for those who don't do love & care for themselves always backfires. The love & care can't be received, they are like endless drains never able to be filled because we cannot be any one else's source. Their source is within themselves, their own connection with the true source. Take a look around you. Who are you loving & caring for? Who drains you? Who uplifts you? Who are you constantly trying to fix because they seem such a mess? The loving & caring thing to do is to allow them to find their own power within them, for them to actually feel the consequences of their not looking after themselves so that they have the motivation to do it for themselves. This often means people have to hit rock bottom before they will bounce back, but we have all been there & bounce back we do! Are there parts of your life where you are not loving & caring for yourself? Because just as we can enable others who aren't caring for themselves, we can also be the ones who aren't loving & caring for ourselves & wanting others to do that for us. It could be your health, or your relationships, or your finances, or addictions,... When you start to love & care for yourself, you open the door to other people who are loving & caring for themselves, who can also love & care for you too, to come in. When loving & caring people love & care for each other it's a win win situation. It uplifts everyone & disempowers no-one. Which brings me to how you can love & care for others & have a positive effect. Loving & caring for those who are loving & caring for themselves. They are taking responsibility. You are taking responsibility. Neither you nor them NEED care from others, but they want it. This care can be received because they are already receiving the care from themselves. The love is uplifting for everyone because it's reciprocated. It's magical. It never depletes. It is the only true giving. It can only be given by those loving & caring for themselves first.  I'm Claire Louise Hay, I help you claim your true power to manifest the life of your dreams through self-awareness and alignment with your higher self. Want to work with me? Click here to find out how!  It was a celebration, smoke filled the room, everyone was drunk, apart from me, I was a small child. My uncle was blowing smoke rings & I was catching them by poking my finger through them "I'll blow smoke rings when I'm a grown up, this is fun!" The adults had stopped making fun of my shyness, they'd stopped laughing at my body, they'd stopped trying to get me to admit that I fancied my cousin, I didn't even know what that meant anyway. The ordeal upstairs had also stopped. I had been molested by the boys, each taking turns to get into bed with me to touch me. My brother being both the ringleader & the first. This was not a safe situation. I was not cared for. This was an abusive situation, the only reality that I knew. Once I was old enough to take care of myself I removed myself from this abuse, or so I had thought. The truth was I was taking care of myself to the almost the same low levels. At age 47 I was still around alcoholics, I was still being made fun of, I was still being yelled at & put down by people who were pretending to love me, I was still around people who made me feel unsafe, I was still in that smoky atmosphere pretending that I was having fun. It was a shock to wake up to the fact that I was neglecting myself, that I wasn't caring for myself, that I wasn't protecting myself, that I wasn't choosing good situations for myself, still. So I took action, I removed myself from the toxicity. I started to take good care of myself, to be the parent for myself that I wish I had had. The ways in which I find easy to take care of myself, my diet, exercise, they were all ways in which I was taken care of as a child. That has come "naturally" to me as a result of my childhood programming. It's the destructive programming that has to go. Deciding on new boundaries & taking action on them, stepping away from what is not good for me is where I am at. The void. I know that the next step will come naturally when I am ready, when I am re-programmed, the stepping toward what IS good for me. Everyday I'm meditating, I'm exercising, I'm eating healthily, I'm working, I'm reading, I'm going to bed early. I'm focused on the basics, the foundations of good self-care, focused on what I can do positively for myself. I'll let you know when the next step comes along. Are you still caring for yourself in the same way, negative & positive, that you were cared for as a child? Do you need to start to take care of yourself better?  I'm Claire Louise Hay, I help you claim your true power to manifest the life of your dreams through self-awareness and alignment with your higher self. Want to work with me? Click here to find out how! |
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