Regular meditation has so many mental, spiritual, emotional & physical benefits. A recent study took angiograms, the x-ray of arteries around the heart, which shows up the formation of blockages that cause heart attacks in their test subjects. They had them meditate every day & then they took angiograms again. Putting the videos side by side they showed that the constrictions had gone, the blood was flowing well to parts of the heart that blood flow had stopped to.
Seeing this evidence was enough to convince me, or remind me, to meditate daily. Now I go through meditation phases and I don't know why I stop, because the personal benefits that I receive from daily meditations is immeasurable, but it seems I need to have reminders like this to get back on the meditation train.

I committed to meditate every day & I had the idea of doing it LIVE every day on my YouTube channel to invite you to meditate with me. I do it before I start work, which is at different times each day, but if you catch me live you can meditate with me or find the replay on my YouTube channel & meditate in your own time. I do it for about 30-60 minutes, but you can join in for 5, 10, 15, however long you want to. Please remember to click the like button on the videos & leave a comment, it helps the algorithm put me out there more!
So many people tell me "I'm not good at meditation" and "I can't quiet my mind!"

Firstly nobody is "good" at meditation, it is a practice of being present with all of the distractions, the thoughts, the feelings, the noises, the itches, that voice in our minds saying "stop meditating, go do something else" being present with that, knowing that it IS the human condition, we all have it & it's ok. In mediation we can be present with it & aware of it & accept it all. This is how we learn self-love through meditation too, it's ok to be human!

Secondly, we all have a subconscious mind, nobodies mind is quiet! Our subconscious minds have a vital role to play in our wellbeing, it chirps on and on about danger, fear, negativity, to try to keep us safe. Meditation isn't about quieting the mind, although you might find the longer you meditate the quieter your mind is, you are not going to be able to force it to happen. It's about being present with it, noticing when the thoughts come up.

I don't know why I'm writing this, because I know it will not get any engagement. Nothing worth anything gets any attention anymore.

It's literally the dumbing down of humanity. Make a video of a cat, or a useless life hack that doesn't even work, the algorithms applaud & show it to everybody. Make something with useful content that might help somebody improve their life & it gets lost in the ethers.

I know it's not the people who are choosing this either. It is the algorithm.

Why? Why would "the powers that be" want us dumbed down?

We live in a world where narcissists reign, they just want to make money, more money, they have enough already but it's not enough for them, they want a bigger pile of money to sit on & to die on. They don't care about anyone else, in fact they've found a way to make the most money, they make addictive food like substances & then pay the government to push it & to fake science that real food is deadly & causing health issues.

They fake management of the health issues that they are creating, not the real food, so that they can make even more money by health issues never going away. Constant supply & demand. It makes the pile of money they sit on even bigger.

Don't believe their lies that they are doing it to solve world issues, they are not, they could do that, they have enough, the world has enough resources that we could all live incredibly amazing lives where we are all enriched by our evolution. But they want a pile of money instead, so to hell with what's best for people & the planet. They just pay for backwards news to be put out that makes people scared of the things they shouldn't be scared of & makes people choose the things that are harming them.

If they had an ounce of compassion or empathy, they would do the right thing. But they don't, so they continue to play their game of monopoly even though they already won. It's not enough for them. When will it be enough for them?

How much destruction do we need to have before they're done? Hmm, they have no empathy so no amount will change them.

The real question is when will YOU have had enough of it?
When will YOU stop going along with it?
When will YOU stop buying their shit?
When will YOU stop believing their shit?

Abusers will abuse until the victims empower themselves. It is true in your romantic relationships, in your friendships, in your families & in the world at large. YOU have the power to stop it, we all do, just opt out, play no part in it anymore, show others that we don't need to go along with it either.

You will never stop a narcissist from being a narcissist, they are never going to stop, they don't have what it takes to stop: introspection, ownership of their issues, empathy, compassion, a flexible & open mind, a heart, a soul, responsibility,...

Waiting for them to stop is as futile as staying in a relationship with a narcissist waiting for them to stop abusing you. Of course they won't, they are getting away with it, you are letting them get away with it. They will always carry on until we empower ourselves & say no, no more, you don't have my permission to do this anymore, I am not available for you to do this to anymore.

​Is that a scary prospect? I can't see it being any scarier than the progression the world is taking right now, can you?

Empaths tend to be over-givers & therefore attract people who will take take take. It's exhausting, so let me teach you how to change this pattern!
The universe is always in a state of balance and when we are out of balance we attract people who are also out of balance but on the opposite side of that balance. Perhaps you believe that it is good to give give give, to be generous, and you're right, it is. But perhaps you also believe that it's not ok to receive, that it's not safe to receive, or that it makes you selfish to receive. When you pair these beliefs up, you have the recipe for an over-giver who doesn't allow reciprocation in.
You might think that if you receive more, then that makes you selfish. But if you think of a scale, on one end of the scale you have those who are completely selfless, who will only give & never receive. On the other end of the scale you have completely selfish people, who only take & will not give a thing. In the middle there is balance. Those who allow themselves to receive as much as they give, those who know they deserve to receive as much as they give. 

These people who are in balance, they can give more & when they do they start to receive more, because they allow it, because they believe in this balance. It is a form of self-love, to know that you deserve to receive.
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Now put yourself in the shoes of the universe. It's your job to match up energies so that everyone gets what they want. You have one person who only wants to receive & they want to give nothing at all, you also have another person who only wants to give & they want to receive nothing at all - MATCH! You will put those 2 people together because they are an out-of-balance match right?

How to receive more:

1. Change your belief system. It's no better to give than to receive. They are both good. Balance is best,

2. Change your expectations of receiving. Know that love is incomplete unless you include yourself in that, self-love. Expect to receive as much energy, love, etc. back as you give out in the world.

3. Hold back your energy in the non-reciprocal situations you have found yourself in. Stop doing it. Opt out. 

4. Notice reciprocity. Allow yourself to receive from what you give. Charge for what you do. Ask for that raise because you work hard. Choose reciprocal people to engage with. When a situation is one-way, remove yourself from the dynamic. No longer be willing to supply the takers with what they are asking for: supply without giving.

I see empaths feeling bad about themselves, comparing themselves to the success, money & shiny things of the non-empaths. Don't do this to yourself!
The non-empaths can do anything, because they don't care who it affects, they can sell you snake oil, they can make up a problem & fake a non-cure, they can sell you harmful things, and they do, they make a lot of money from it & gain a lot of success from it. They pretend to be perfect, they fake their results, they yell "look at me" whilst not being any of those things in reality.
Do not compare yourself & your results to these people - the world is rewarding narcissistic behaviour enough, don't become a part of it!

Non-empaths are feeling bad about themselves when they should be feeling good! We are sooooooo much better than the narcissists, our hearts, our love, our caring, the way we do the right thing, they way we want to make the world a better place, the way we will not compromise ourselves.

We not only need to appreciate these things in ourselves but we need to speak out to others and appreciate them openly for them doing the right thing too.
We can make a huge difference in an empaths life by telling them "You're great, you really care, it is so lacking in our world, you're the best!" "You always do the right thing, you really care, I love that about you!"
Tell the empathic men too! "Your caring is so attractive, it's so much more attractive that all that money & the fancy cars & the bling" "I'd pick a man with a good heart like you over a man with outer success any day of the week!"
They need to know, it needs to be spoken out. Sometimes we need to hear it to remind ourselves, yes, it's true, we are soooooo much better than the narcissists! It's harder to do the right thing in a world that rewards ding the wrong thing more!

Let's stop appreciating the empaths traits silently. Let's shout about it! Let's point it out & make each other feel better, feel more empowered, feel more able to shine.
Help the empaths with their businesses, stop buying from the narcissists, let's show the world that we promote empaths, we support positive human traits in people, we reward these people!
Be the change you want to see in the world!
By the way, your heart, it's awesome, I love the way you do good in the world, you are awesome, I wish there were more people like you, I appreciate you!

I have 2 stories to tell you, 2 stories that until today I have not linked, but now has me questioning "Do 50% of humans not have empathy?

"My therapist said that I'm a psychopath!" my colleague on arriving into the office one morning, I was the only one there. My mind was racing, aren't psychopaths serial killers, should I be scared right now? My response was "Huh? You're a serial killer?" This seemed at odds with my feeling & experience of him as a very intellligent, funny, deep guy, who I liked, very much. He said no, he tried to explain it to me this way, "Claire, how do you know the difference between good & bad?" I said it's inside of me, I just know, I feel it. He said "Yes, it's that, I don't have that, I don't know the difference between good and bad unless I have been told what is good or bad. Then I have a choice of doing the good thing or not" I was amazed "So you could do anything & not feel bad about it?" He said "Yes, but I know not to do the bad things, because I've been told not to" 
So his therapist said that this is a psychopath diagnosis, I think more reasonably called a non-empath, somebody who doesn't feel for other people, so they don't have an inner feeling of wrong & right.

"Just fall in love with that guy Claire" said my friend about a mutual friend that we knew. My visceral reaction was to look at her curiously as if she had just said "Just fly up to the moon & back Claire" How could I decide to fall in love with some guy like that? That's not how love works, faking in love is not something I choose to do, it's something that I feel that I have no control over. Now I can choose to love, but falling in love, that's a totally different experience, and out of my control. Oh romance would be so much easier if I could choose who to fall in love with! It had me go down this rabbit hole of learning about limerence.
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A scientist interviewed a lot of people, asking them about their experiences falling in love. He was surprised to learn that all of the people he interviewed fell into 2 different experiences of love. Some were limerent, meaning that they fell in love, a feeling that took over them about somebody else they didn't choose logically, these people were prone to obsessive thoughts about their person, in fact it could take over everything in their life for a while. The people who were in the other camp, they chose somebody & developed a relationship with them which turned into feelings of connection and what they called love. But they don't have that overwhelming feeling of falling in love. When asked what they think of romantic movies about falling in love, their response would be "I always thought it was just that, a movie, make believe, that people didn't really experience this, like Santa"

Dr Ramani, the world expert on Narcissism, specifically in healing from narcissistic abuse, has said anywhere from 1 in 6 showing narcissistic traits to I think 1 in 20 being diagnosable narcissists. I think this is a guess, I haven't heard of any studies having found this out.
​I believe that Narcissism, Psychopathy, Abusers, I think all of these may be found in the non-empath camp. What if non-empathy is the personality type & it can manifest as harmful (to others) behaviour if they weren't brought up right, or had a lack of religion, or just a lack of anybody teaching them right from wrong, or perhaps being taught by society or others around them that it's right or at least ok to harm others?
What if the apparent rise of these narcissistic traits is not because there are more non-empaths than ever, but because of the fall in religion, the fall in parents having more time with their children to bring them up, capitalism rewarding narcissistic behaviour, algorithms rewarding narcissistic behaviour? What if it is being encouraged in them & this is why we are seeing the negative manifestation of non-empathy?

I often wondered what the difference was between me & my brother, how we could have grown up along side each other experiencing the same abuse, or very similar, and he chose to abuse too, whereas I would never want anybody to experience what I experienced & to feel that way.
I wondered why when my ex husband had experienced his first child being turned against him, would he do the exact same thing to me "But you know how this feels" I said "why would you do the same thing to me?" I could never figure out why people often would not do the same thing that I would,

The personality trait of empathy a feeling state that drives empaths, it causes us to never want to harm someone, never want others to feel bad, most definitely if we have felt something previously as the victim of it. It causes us to inherently do the right thing by others & by the world.
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But this same personality trait is lacking in what percentage of people? 
If limerence is a side effect of empathy, then we are looking at 50% of people having empathy & 50% of people not having empathy.

Single empaths are having a terrible time dating right now, because there are so many narcissists out there. Take a look at any social media post about it, read the comments & you will find men calling out all women as being narcissists, and the women calling out all the men as being narcissists, but they're pointing at the wrong trait. It's not about gender, it's about non-empathy & if we can discern non-empathy in people then not get into relationships with them, not friendships or romantic relationships then we will experience better. If we can discern empathy in people & choose these ones to have friendships & romantic relationships with (& yes, limerents this means not trusting your feelings because you can fall in love with either very easily!) then we will have much better relationships.

I do want to mention here that this isn't about good or bad people. Non-empaths exist & the universe doesn't make mistakes. They are awesome at business, clearly that they don't take others feelings into account is a gift that can have them focus on building things, creating things. Sure these things might harm people, like giant  corporations that make highly addictive non-food products that destroy our health, and their buddies giant pharmaceutical companies selling the products that still keep you just sick enough to keep needing them but never healthy again,  & the people they pay to sell their junk, government organisations, health-care systems, mainstream media,... Did you ever wonder why there is an organisation called the Food & Drug Administration? Why would those 2 things be linked together?

What if the non-empaths were never supposed to be making the decisions? What if they don't make good leaders? Why would someone who doesn't take into account the people be the right person to be a leader in anything? What if empaths should be the ones making the decisions, leading the way? What if the empaths decide what is right and wrong, and then steer the non-empaths to shine their awesomeness in the right direction for humanity?

Wouldn't that create a much better balance for everybody thriving? Wouldn't that be evolution?

As long as disregard for people & the planets wellbeing is being rewarded, profit no matter what & once you have the money you have the power & can therefore decide, we are on a terrible trajectory. We are clearly in  process of devolution right now, things are getting worse.

I have hope that people with empathy will recognise how valuable our traits are, & that they are essential to the collective. I have hope that we will rise up & be the decision makers. Not to make non-empaths wrong: but to work together for the benefit of everybody. I have hope. I also hope that it doesn't require even more devastation than we already have to get to this point of change.