Who are your spiritual tools really for?

For the past week or so, I've been unusually quiet.
Not because I had nothing to say.
Because I was told something that had me pull my energy back to myself.
4 of Pentacles. 4 of Swords. Receive before you give any more away.

At first, I didn't really understand what that meant.
Then I noticed something I'd been doing for years.
Every time I received a piece of guidance, a realisation, a channelled message or a breakthrough, I immediately wanted to hand it to everyone else.

Like a hot potato.
"Oh! People need to hear this."
"I have to teach this."
"I need to make a reel."
"I should write a blog."
It was almost impossible for me to simply receive something and allow it to nourish me first.

Looking back, I realise I had unconsciously turned every gift into another job.
Every insight became something to package for you.
Every revelation became something to give away.
Before I had even allowed it to be for me.

---

What if your spiritual practice wasn't another performance?
​Something else happened this week.
I've always known that I do my best intuitive work after meditation.
When my mind is quiet.
When I'm in an altered state of consciousness.

For years that became another pressure.
I needed to get myself into that perfect state before I could begin.

If I felt anxious...
If my nervous system felt dysregulated...
If life had thrown me around that day...
It felt like I had failed.
As though I needed to fix myself before I was allowed to receive anything.

This week I realised...
My tools weren't there to judge whether I had reached the right state.
They were there to help me reach that state.
That changed everything.

---

I stopped trying to perform calm.
​Instead...
I held a glass of water.
I asked it to fill me with peace.
To calm my nervous system.
To bless me with love and support.
Then I simply drank it.
Not because I believed I had earned peace.
Because I wanted to receive it.
I wanted water to help me.

I picked up my tuning forks.
Not to perform an energy healing.
Not because someone had booked a session.
Not to help somebody else.
For me.
To help my own body settle.

I held my amethyst.
Not because I was trying to become more spiritual.
Not to give me a channeled message to hand out to everyone else.
Because I wanted something comforting to hold.

I lit a candle.
Burned sage.
Listened to binaural beats.
Not to "raise my vibration."
But because they helped my nervous system soften.

I pulled tarot and oracle cards.
Not to predict the future.
Not to channel for someone else.
But because I wanted them to remind me that I was supported.

Every one of those things became something I could receive from.
Instead of something I had to work for and perform with.

---

Then I understood something that had troubled me for years.
Many years ago I listened to a lot of Law of Attraction teachings.
One message always felt deeply uncomfortable to me.
The idea that you had to already feel abundant before abundance could arrive.
Perhaps I misunderstood it.
Perhaps I interpreted it through my own wounds.

But it felt like just more abuse and neglect delivered by baby boomers.
Cry it out alone. Self-soothe. You can't get a soothing hug unless you are already calm. There is no love and support available to help YOU.
"You don't get help until you've already helped yourself."

It felt familiar.
Painfully familiar.
As though receiving was something I had to earn.
As though I wasn't allowed support until I had already become the version of myself who no longer needed it.
That makes me want to cry, it breaks my heart for my younger self and my current self.

This week I realised something completely different.
Abundance can meet me exactly where I am.
I don't have to become peaceful before peace arrives.
I can receive things that help me become peaceful.
I don't have to become supported before support appears.
I don't have to support everyone else before I am supported in return.
​
Support is what helps me feel supported.
That simple shift brought even more tears to my eyes.

---

My business is for me too.
​Perhaps the biggest revelation of all...
...was that my business exists to support me.
Not just everyone else.

For years I unconsciously treated my business as somewhere I poured all of myself. I worked for my business.
My energy.
My wisdom.
My healing.
My care.

Then quietly hoped enough came back to survive. It rarely has.

​Now I see it differently.
My business pays my rent.
It pays my bills.
It is a tool that reduces my anxiety.
It creates freedom.
​
Money isn't a prize I earn for exhausting myself.
It's a tool that supports my life.
Just like my tuning forks.
Just like my cards.
Just like my meditation.
Just like my glass of water.
Everything in my life is allowed to support me.
Not only the people around me.

---

What in your life is waiting to support you?
Maybe it's your journal.
Maybe it's your favourite mug.
Maybe it's your garden.
Maybe it's music.
Maybe it's your tarot cards.
Maybe it's prayer.
Maybe it's a walk by the sea.
Whatever it is...
Try asking a different question.
Instead of:
"How do I use this?"
Ask:
"How can I receive from this?"
You might be surprised by the answer.

---

I used to think my spiritual practice was about becoming someone who could give endlessly.
Now I think it's teaching me something much simpler.

I deserve to receive calm.
I deserve to receive love.
I deserve to receive abundance.

Not because I have reached the perfect vibration.
Not because I have performed spirituality well enough.
Simply because I am alive.
​
And perhaps that's what being a Sacred Receiver really means.

Your Future Isn't One Fixed Path
​One of the things I love most about reading the runes is that they rarely show a single future. They reveal the different timelines, choices and opportunities unfolding around you, along with the hidden patterns that may be keeping you on your current path.
If you're curious about what your soul is opening you to next, I'd love to read for you.
Explore Rune Timeline Readings →